I Was the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from the Arnold Schwarzenegger Comedy: An Interview.

The Austrian Oak is rightfully celebrated as an action movie legend. Yet, during the peak of his blockbuster fame in the 1980s and 1990s, he also headlined several critically acclaimed comedies. The standout film is Kindergarten Cop, which celebrates its 35th anniversary this December.

The Role and The Famous Scene

In the classic film, Schwarzenegger embodies a hardened detective who goes undercover as a schoolteacher to catch a killer. During the movie, the crime storyline acts as a loose framework for Arnold to film humorous scenes with children. The most unforgettable features a student named Joseph, who unprompted rises and declares the stoic star, “Males have a penis, and girls get a vagina.” Schwarzenegger replies icily, “Thanks for the tip.”

That iconic child was brought to life by child star Miko Hughes. Beyond this role encompassed a recurring role on Full House playing the antagonist to the famous sisters and the pivotal role of the youngster who comes back in the screen translation of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. Hughes remains active today, with a slate of movies on the horizon. He also engages with fans at fan conventions. He recently discussed his experiences from the production after all this time.

A Young Actor's Perspective

Interviewer: First, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: I think I was four. I was the youngest of all the kids on set.

That's impressive, I have no memory from being four. Do you have any memories from that time?

Yeah, to a degree. They're flashes. They're like visual recollections.

Do you recall how you were cast in Kindergarten Cop?

My mother, mainly would bring me to auditions. Frequently it was a mass tryout. There'd be a room full of young actors and we'd all just have to wait, be seen, be in there for a very short time, read a small part they wanted and that's all. My parents would help me learn the words and then, once I learned to read, that was some of the first material I was reading.

Do you have an impression of meeting Arnold? What was your feeling about him?

He was extremely gentle. He was playful. He was nice, which I guess makes sense. It would be strange if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom, that likely wouldn't create a good work environment. He was great to work with.

“It'd be weird if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom.”

I knew he was a major movie star because my family informed me, but I had not actually watched his movies. I knew the air around him — like, that's cool — but he didn't frighten me. He was just fun and I only wanted to hang out with him when he had time. He was working hard, but he'd occasionally joke around here and there, and we would hang off of his arms. He'd tense up and we'd be hanging off. He was exceptionally kind. He gifted all the students in the classroom a personal stereo, which at the time was a major status symbol. This was the must-have gadget, that iconic bright yellow cassette player. I played the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for ages on that thing. It wore out in time. I also received a real silver whistle. He had the referee's whistle, and the kids all received one too as well.

Do you remember your experience as being enjoyable?

You know, it's funny, that movie became a phenomenon. It was such a big movie, and it was such an amazing experience, and you would think, in retrospect, I would want my memories to be of collaborating with Schwarzenegger, the legendary director, the location shoot, seeing the set, but my memories are of being a finitely child at lunch. Like, they got everyone pizza, but I didn't even like pizza. All I would eat was the meat from the top. Then, the first-generation Game Boy was just released. That was the coolest toy, and I was pretty good at it. I was the smallest kid and some of the older kids would hand me their devices to pass certain levels on games because I could do it, and I was quite pleased with myself. So, it's all little kid memories.

The Infamous Moment

OK, that specific dialogue, do you remember the context? Did you know what you were saying?

At the time, I likely didn't understand what the word shocking meant, but I understood it was edgy and it caused the crew to chuckle. I knew it was kind of something I wouldn't usually utter, but I was given special permission in this case because it was humorous.

“She really wrestled with it.”

How it came about, based on what I was told, was they didn't have specific roles. Some character lines were part of the original screenplay, but once they had the whole cast on the set, it wasn't necessarily improv, but they refined it on set and, presumably the filmmakers came to my mom and said, "We're thinking. We want Miko to deliver this dialogue. Are you okay with this?" My mom didn't answer immediately. She said, "I need to consider this, I'll decide tomorrow" and took some time. She really wrestled with it. She said she wasn't sure, but she felt it would likely become one of the most memorable lines from the movie and her instinct was correct.